Mara, Maya, Mary, Nefertiti, and Mercurius

taken from ANARCHY OF SPIRIT: an epistle for ridiculous times,  from early writings by Jack Haas: this is a rare, online book

page 24

 

I have no guilt, no remorse, no regrets. I paid back what I owed, did my penance in return- or was forgiven when it was beyond my ability to repair- and was purchased out of the prison of context. I finished with my earthly debts and left others to pay back their own.

Listen to me friends- I have not lived inside your tortured context, and I shall not die in that prison either. I was only loosely bound to the vain glory of impotent consternation, and I have lived too perilously long within the hypocrisy of discernment. I do not excel before the altar of coherence. I will not suffocate in the vapors of life's ambush. I have died that death already.

Though neither have I bled endlessly through the wound of consciousness for nothing; if I have only stuck my earnest spirit out from the warm abyss for long enough to spill forth my bile and laughter then, as now, while the roaring blade hastens whistling towards its mark, I shall miss not a beat, not a word, not a jingle, but calmly wail out my true song, my vision, my life.

 

Let me tell you, in my frantic peregrinations throughout the civilizations and wild lands of this earth, I found our famed Mercurius, the fair Nefertiti, the wild Poseidon, and the perishing Pan. I met and drank with the worn apostle Paul, and was kissed by the new and ever gentler Assisi. I knew those who could converse with animals, and others who saw the Living Light in day. I walked with Christ, was assumed up to heaven, met saints and angels in the ether, was kissed by the Mary, coddled by the Mother Earth, and beaten horribly by the heavens. I found angels dying everywhere (angels die because they don't believe in themselves, that's all, but that's plenty.).

I found my evolving anima twice in this life, loved her both times, and flew away higher in the end- light and laughing I was lifted off to nowhere. And my true soul mate- even her I loved in the flesh become spirit in our day.

Yea indeed you must find the mirrors of your own soul in the flesh, or you shall never yourself get truly out alive. It's like the first few pieces of this infinite, confused puzzle, finally coming together- then the whole broken picture has a focal point from which to grow back to One. 

I also became wise to the ways of Mara, or Maya, or the Second Mary, as you will. My temptress, my illusion, my lover. And I met the sublime, sensuous soul within us all, and we fell in love. She told me what to do. I tried to follow. I call her Will. She is the one who drags me away from myself. And to her I sometimes go willingly, but only so as to drag her back out. 

I roamed wild in the tempest of the archetypes, and held audience with the Myths and Muses. I sought wholeness and mercy for all, spoke with men of god, and god himself on occasion, and let me tell you, life was still all crazy and insane.

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Early writings by Jack Haas: a rare, online book.

 

 

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